My thoughts today are very messy but I couldn’t wait for them to calmed down. It’s feels like the ocean, the waves just keep hitting the coast with such a passion and power. I have to let them out..
Lately I wrote about my beliefs, and belief system.
How much we are affected by others and their opinion about us..?!
What about this part: our self-esteem? How much we are intend to base our self-esteem on what other people think?
From this point of view it’s not really a self-esteem, is it? Self – esteem suppose to be how we feel about ourselves.
Just think about it for a second: how dangerous it is to allow other people to determine how you’re going to feel about You!
It’s like looking into a broken mirror, and just change your face to try to look good for others to like you.
Other’s opinions is a really shitty way to determine how we feel about ourselves.
Again: Other’s Opinion Does not Become Your Reality.
It may seems too much to talk about this, but all the big transformations starts in the mind and soul.
The last two weeks I’m struggling myself with my emotions, my belief system.
I had ‘too much rest day‘ from my training. And I wasn’t able to push the pressure and the stress out of my mind an body. Exercising, training, sport, yoga, meditation or anything else really, it’s like a therapy. Helps you to be in more control with your mind and body. For me it’s like alcohol or drug, wanting to have it, use it, get pumped up on them, happy, and only I don’t have hangover after the ‘feeling is got out of my system’. I stay more happier, stay more satisfied that “yes I made it!”.
The reason, the real reason I started to go on the fitness path is my self -esteem, not just having a six pack :). It is hard to admit, because if you know me, probably say, that I think ‘too much’ about myself. Well, you couldn’t have been more wrong. Can I say that I don’t have any self -esteem or it is just that bad?!
For example, when I started to train, the gym is covered by mirror everywhere but I couldn’t look. Still, today is hard to look up and watch myself.. I feel so silly to do that though.
I don’t like to look at myself, and only in the morning once I look into the mirror and that’s all. I am not confident with myself at all.
And it’s not about I am not happy with my body. Of course, want to transform my body to look better, but when I look into the mirror I see no one. Looking deep into those blue eyes and searching. I don’t recognise that soul. I don’t like the person I see, at least a big part of her. And why? I don’t know.
Still, not sure who’s eyes I am looking into when I’m standing in front of that broken mirror. But I know now, she is there who she has to be and I’ll find her! I see a confused yet determined young soul who wants to Clear the Runway, so then She can Fly!
I believe, I can create whatever I want to create.
Just have to put my head on it right, study and learn the patterns. I feel very strongly: We are who we choose to be!
It’s a long road and on it for quiet some time now but I have to tell you, that even though going through hard times. I wouldn’t change a thing – I wished before, but today, now, I wouldn’t change anything. Because I would not have experienced it all, I wouldn’t have learnt what I did so far. And who I will become will not be that person without those memories.
I’m learning to believe – day by day – in myself. I’m learning to accept who I am, what I can not control, learning to love myself.
Note: Having a bad moment, day or a week, doesn’t mean I haven’t make any changes, it means that I have to learn more about what making me feel the way I feel.
Only ONE key step has to be make if you are searching yourself too:
There is a power inside of you … that making a choice has rather then you are feeling that you are effected through all the things that happening. Make a choice, just decide: what is gonna be, who you’re gonna be and how you are going to do it. Just decide and the from that point it will workout everything ..
To know who you are and what you are believe in and that is all what you need to know. Is that simple!
My advice for the road: Just keep going on your path, do not let the roadblock scare you away!
Peace&Love
Miti